As every dad knows, fatherhood isn't all fun and games. But our recent Father's Day question, "Are you a fun dad?" did prompt a number of amusing stories. We heard about dads who moonwalk, sing ZZ Top songs, play "name that potato," dress up as the Grim Reaper on holidays and find various other ways to connect with their sons and daughters.
A common theme from dads was a desire to embarrass their kids.
One reader, Russell Abbott of Tulsa, Okla., told us how he spotted his daughter's school bus and started honking incessantly just to mortify her.
I think playfully and harmlessly embarrassing kids is one of the most profound joys of fatherhood.
Apparently, embarrassing your child on the school bus is an international tradition for dads. Another reader, S.T. from Amherst, Mass., recalled a childhood memory in India.
We once dropped my older sister off at the interstate bus that would take her back to college. We were in a small town in India with many parallel roads intersecting the main one, and once we waved her goodbye, my father would zoom around the block to the next intersection and wait for her bus to pass so we could all wave to her again. She was most embarrassed, but I found it hilarious.
PB of Washington also enjoys taunting his teenage son.
I have a pair of running shoes that squeak when I walk in them. This doesn't bother me, but it really annoys my 17-year-old son. Thus, I try to wear them all the time when he's around.
Sometimes the embarrassment turned into pride, wrote Becky Siefert, who learned her father was gay when she was a fifth grader.
This was in the early '90s. I was embarrassed at first to tell my friends. I was embarrassed to walk around with him and his boyfriend because I figured everyone knew and would make fun of me at school. At the same time, he was my favorite person in the world — he liked "Ren & Stimpy," Matt Groening and "Seinfeld" … and every year he brought us to the Christmas display at the bank downtown, with all of the animatronic stuffed animals in fake snow. This year I'm grateful that we can celebrate Wisconsin's recently won marriage equality, something I never envisioned would happen when I was a kid.
We also heard from a few dads who had rather risky definitions of "fun."
From rbpasker in New York City:
Yesterday I got on my 5-year-old daughter's bike and rode it around the living room. When she complained that I was going to break her bike, told her to stand on the training wheels and hold on to my shoulders. Then I put my 3-year-old son on the handlebars.
Scott from Los Angeles generated some outrage from fellow readers when he described his fun dad antics behind the wheel. (He claims he was only pretending to close his eyes.)
I would speed up over dips or speed bumps in my capable Jeep. I would then name the bump after a Disney character. … When a bit older, again in the car we would play the "how long can Daddy keep his eyes closed while driving" game.
Nancy McDermott recalls a father who was quite protective.
My father threatened to disembowel my boyfriends if they ever hurt me. Makes me smile just to think of it.
Music was also something shared by fun dads and their kids.
A Tennessee dad wrote to us from the Bonnaroo music festival, which he was attending with his teenage son and adult daughters.
I have hung with them at shows here that have ended at 3:00 a.m. or later for the past three nights, and I have been doing this for the past 10 years. I am not sure but I am almost positive that they would agree this is at least part of what makes our relationships fun. As it turns out, quality time really starts with quantity time.
Monroe of Santa Fe wrote that her husband made music a part of their children's lives.
He was convinced that our children needed to know the history of rock, especially punk, at a very early age. They would be pajamaed and ready for bed when his lessons would begin and late into the night he would play "one more song" to their delight. My concerns for the sleep requirements of small children were no match for the Ramones.
Claire, a reader from Washington, said her father made his own music.
He would play the piano for my siblings and I, laughing and cracking jokes as he tried to get us to sing along with Sondheim show tunes and ZZ Top songs. … He was the fun in everything.
Some readers described fun dads who donned costumes.
One reader from New York remembered how his father, a city sanitation worker, wore a circus clown costume every Halloween.
Face paint, hat with two brims, ginormous shoes, carried a big loud horn and surprised the elementary school class I happened to be in that year. At the time I wanted to hide under my desk, but looking back on it — I was so lucky.
Andrea S of New Haven recalled how her father selflessly helped her complete a history project.
He dressed up as Babe Didrikson for my fifth grade historical women project. He was my Girl Scout troop leader (the best ever), he taught me how to sew, and coached our soccer teams.
Sometimes the dads who are the most fun aren't fathers at all, wrote Desiree Roundtree of Brooklyn.
All throughout my childhood, my grandpa was there — sharing magic tricks with me, spending Saturday mornings in Roy Rogers and shopping for comic books on Chambers Street. He let me give him manicures and facials while we watched "Jeopardy."
Some dads had their own dances …
Even at 56, he insists that he can perfectly execute the moonwalk, all the while dragging the soles of his feet backwards in the most bewildering fashion. (Huiqun Ong of London)
And languages …
Daddy would say "boogie" and I would say "boo" and then in unison we would say "boogiebooboogiebooboogieboo." We did this every single day. (Leigh Sanders of North Carolina)
Victoria of Bainbridge Island, Wash., wrote about a fun dad of five children who took on a new role when her mother died.
Daddy was both father and mother after my mom died when I was 7. … He took us on summer car trips across the U.S., peppering us with history and geography questions. … He bought us books nonstop. He didn't hover over us, but let us follow our adventures independently, ready to listen when we came home.
Some fun dads really knew how to celebrate life's important moments, wrote Anna.
One day when I was a senior in high school I was unexpectedly called into the principal's office. I arrived to find my father sitting there with a stony look on his face. I was sure I was in big trouble (though for what I had no idea). They asked me to sit down and said they needed to discuss a very serious issue with me. All of a sudden my dad broke into a huge smile and pulled out a large envelope from my first-choice college with "congratulations" scrawled across the front.
And we are giving the final word to Honeybee from Dallas, who wrote about her husband and reminded us that many fun dads aren't always taking part in the fun.
He's also the dad in the sports stands in 20-degree weather. He's the dad who drives 45 minutes to watch his kid warm the bench. He's the dad who wakes up at 5:30 a.m. and sings while he makes everyone's lunches. He's the dad who drops everything to be wherever, whenever.
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